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Redefining Medical Terms ?

+2 votes
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Nov 12 in Fun & Humor ☻ by Marianne (16,201 points)
Redefined Medical Terms

Artery: The study of fine paintings
Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria
Barium: What doctors do when patients die
Catscan: Searching for kitty
Cauterize: Made eye contact with her
Coma: A punctuation mark.
D&C: Where Washington is
Enema: Not a friend
ER: The things on your head that you hear with
Fester: Quicker than someone else
Genes: Blue denim slacks
G.I. Series: World Series of military baseball
Hemorrhoid: A male from outer space
Impotent: Distinguished, well-known
Medical Staff: A doctor’s cane
Morbid: A higher offer than I bid
Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates
Organ Transplant: What you do to your piano when you move
Outpatient: A person who has fainted
Pap Smear: Making fun of Dad
Pathalogical: A reasonable way to go
Pharmacist: Person who makes a living dealing in agriculture
Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative: A letter carrier
Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery
Rectum: Almost killed him
Red Blood Count: Dracula
Secretion: Hiding something
Seizure: Roman Emperor
Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport.
Thorax: A Dr. Seuss character
Triple Bypass: Better than a quarterback sneak
Tumor: More than one, an extra pair
Varicose: Near by/close by
Vein : Conceited

image

Link: https://www.aimseducation.edu/blog/ridiculously-funny-medical-jokes/

3 Answers

Rooster Nov 12

Reminds me of some of my Doctors! LOL. :D :D :D

Marianne Rooster Nov 12

Lol, Rooster, I can only guess that their humour was rather sarcastic ...

:O:D:D:D


TheOtherTink Nov 12

Endoscope: a device for looking in either end.

Mammogram: a telegram from your Mamma.

Speculum: a device that provides a spectacle.


Lol, T(h)ink, brilliant!

:D:D:D


But they are not much fun.  :O :blush: :( :angel: :) :D

Virginia Nov 13

Just for you, Marianne...my beloved version of "medical staff"...the Rod of Aesculapius!

image


Marianne Virginia Nov 13

Virginia, that is indeed the very version, and it is also the symbol of true vocation. I still believe in it. <3:)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hippocratic_Oath


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