One day a man, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years sees an unusual speck on the horizon. "It's certainly not a ship", he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, or even a raft. Suddenly, emerging from the surf, comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.
She approaches the stunned guy and says: "Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a cigarette?" "Ten years," replies the man, his mouth agape.
With that, she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says: "Man, oh man! Is that ever GOOD!"
"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of bourbon?" she asks him. Trembling, the castaway replies: "Ten years." She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him.
He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says: "WOW, that's absolutely fantastic!"
At this point, she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper on the front of her wet suit, looks at the man seductively, and asks: "And how long has it been since you've had some real fun?"
With tears in his eyes, the guy falls to his knees and sobs: "OMG! Don't tell me you've got a laptop?"