+3 votes
in Fun & Humor ☻ by
A group of bikers are racing along when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?" "I'm going to commit suicide," she says. While he doesn't want to appear insensitive, he also doesn't want to miss an opportunity, so he asks, "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?" She does, and it is a long, deep, lingering kiss. After she's finished, the tough, hairy biker says: "Wow! That was the best kiss I've ever had! That's a real talent you're wasting. You could be famous. Why are you committing suicide?" "My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl..."

1 Answer

+2 votes

I think I posted the following joke before:

It has been a very slow day at the Pearly Gates, and St. Peter is just starting to doze off, when he is awakened by the appearance of a soul, fresh from Earth.  St. Peter asks his name and takes out the soul's folder from a bulging file cabinet.  After studying the file for a few minutes, St. Peter says, "Well, according to your record, you have been neither particularly good nor bad, so I'm not sure where to send you. Tell me, is there anything you can say about yourself that might help me come to a decision?"

The soul thinks for a minute and then says, "Well, I was driving along in my car, when I saw a young lady whose car had broken down by the side of the road.  She was being harassed by a gang of bikers who had her surrounded and were about to tear off her clothes and have their way with her. Well, I screeched to a halt, jumped out of my car and approached the leader of the gang. He was a big brute, about 6'6", 300 pounds, bulging biceps and tattoos all over his body, but I didn't let that stop me. I marched right up to him, grabbed him by his leather lapels and told him that if he and his gang of thugs didn't leave the young lady alone, they would have ME to deal with."

St. Peter says, "I'm deeply impressed... but I can't understand why such a brave and noble deed isn't in your file.  When did this happen?"

"Oh, about ten minutes ago."