What Do You See?

Question

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were camping.

After a good supper and a bottle of wine at the nearby restaurant, they returned to their tent, crept into their sleeping bags and were soon fast asleep.

Some hours later, Holmes woke up all in a sudden, and shook his friend awake:
- "Hey, Watson, look at the sky and tell me what you see!"

Watson: - "I see millions and millions of stars."

Holmes: - "What's your conclusion?"

Watson: - "From the astronomical point of view, I would say that there are millions of galaxies and, potentially, billions of planets; from the astrological point of view, Saturn is entering the constellation of the Lion. If referring to the calendar, I would estimate that it is about 3.15 h a.m. Theologically, I believe that God is all-mighty, and that we are very small and insignificant. Meteorologically speaking, I think that tomorrow will be a bright day. And what's your idea, Holmes?"

Sherlock Holmes remained silent for a minute or so and stated then very calmly:
- "Watson, you are a jackass! Somebody stole our tent."



Link (translated): http://lemotdelasemaine.com/anerie.html

Answer 1

Wait a minute!

Sherlock Holmes would never have been so rude as to call Dr Watson a jackass!

He would have said, "No, no, no. What you say is true but, I regret to say, quite irrelevant... My deduction is that someone has stolen our tent!  Elementary, my dear Watson."

Comments

Lol - I was also surprised: in the French version, they used "âne", i.e. donkey, or Equus asinus. By the way, it is rather an insult on donkeys, who are also much gentler and cuter than idiots:

And the old British gentlemen in Sherlock's time were certainly not so prissy - lol.

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@ Marianne:

Lol, "donkey" is sometimes used in English to indicate a stupid person, but it is not as rude as "jackass" or "ass".  How rude is "âne" on that scale in French?

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It is only used for silly (or undisciplined) people, but I couldn't find donkey.

In schools, formerly, they used the "bonnet d'âne" to punish pupils in schools (and send them to the corner), i.e. the donce's hat.

N.B.

In this cartoon, "it is the corner of the bad citizen".

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The Urban Dictionary vient à la rescousse! 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=donkey

(see especially, defs. 3, 6 and 7)

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@T(h)ink
Bravo! I'd rather not cite the Italian song mentioning "a la riscossa" rhyming with "rossa" - lol.

- « Au secours, au secours, à la rescousse! »

s'égosillat la semeuse rousse:

- « j'ai égaré mon p'tit Larousse ... »

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Petit_Larousse

- s'égosiller (-at: preterite): to shout oneself hoarse

- semeuse: sower

- rousse (feminine form of roux): red-haired, redhead

Lol - true, I did miss "to act like a donkey" (maybe "to think" or "to reason", in this case), I looked under sentences "you're a donkey", or "you're a stupid donkey" sounds, somehow, awkward, and I did not like Sherlock to address his dear friend Dr. Watson with "you're an idiot" or "you idiot":

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Stupid%20Donkey

http://dictionary.reverso.net/french-english/%C3%A2ne%20b%C3%A2t%C3%A9

(the Germans refer to "dumbass", which doesn't look better - lol)

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Lol, maybe 'Kamel' would be a little less rude in German. 

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Lol - that might work:

http://www.duden.de/rechtschreibung/Kamel

But "Kamel" stands for the family, the Camelids (dromedary camels, Bactrian and wild Bactrian camels, llamas, alpacas, guanacos, vicuñas), while the English "camel" or the French "chameau" refer to the Bactrian camel (with two humps, wild or domesticated).

But you can refer to a funny name: das Trampeltier

https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trampeltier

By the way, the wild species, Camelus ferus, is critically endangered.

Answer 2

Ha! Love it!   

Comments

I am glad that you like it.

Answer 3

'nkay, Marianne...ima kinda follow the thread O'Tink took up here...coz the term "jackass" comes perilously close to a passionate expression, and our Sherlock would never ruffle them perfect brain cells of flawless logic with ANYTHING so crass as (ugh) ... passion...

But I love the story anyway!

* * *

Here he is...just a consummate Sherlock...actor Rupert Everett!

Comments

Wow, you might be right regarding Rupert Everett, but I heard that - unlike in "clean" English literature - English aristocrats had not always such a noble language - but it was the way they used gross words - with elegance and phlegm. Furthermore, still half asleep, the hero was probably more emotional - lol.

And this little critter is so cute:

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Ha ha I love that, Marianne..."gross words with elegance and phlegm"...(sigh) now I feel I have missed something important in life (or at least fun)...

Oh and yes, Sherlock may have been caught off guard and just let something slip, akin to passion...under the circumstance...

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Lol - it is always inspiring to read or see good humour, and the typically dry, elegant British humour spiced with some slapstick incidents is still very popular.

And here's an "evergreen" you might like - (I can't help sharing it):

Dinner for One

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Oh...Marianne...I do NOT know how the Brits do it...I had never seen this, such a classic...

I admire the British! Not a flawless folk, but what they do it is with such...panache...

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@Virginia

Lol - the Brits are not the only ones, of course, but for their dry and very black humour, they are famous - as English is still the business language "par excellence" - at an international level - although, increasingly challenged by other widely spoken languages.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_languages_by_number_of_native_speakers

About humour:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Humour

And this rating is just one example among others:

https://www.thetoptens.com/countries-best-sense-humor/

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Marianne, I enjoyed especially the list of countries by sense of humour...France coming in first! I do not know much about their humour. And England second...USA tenth, with this the favourite comment: "U.S. humour too immature and too in your face for my liking. It's just stupid humour that is very unsubtle and therefore boring."

I grew up in a family with a great sense of fun and funny, and never hurtful...so it is interesting to compare with other countries, who would have thought there can be a national sense of humour!

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Actually, you can't go for a nationality. The most easily understood humour is still the slapstick comedy, as shown in old silent movies, in which gestures, actions and expressions are more easily understood than word games in a different language. Furthermore, languages, educational backgrounds, experiences and mentalities other than yours - and their subtleties - might not agree with your personal sense of humour. And every region or country has its funny and less funny people. And even in a local group with similar backgrounds, knowledge and opinions, there will be different reactions, i.e. what's hilarious for A and C will not be automatically funny for B.

This old "English Lesson" is funny, whether you understand French or not:

from the movie: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gendarme_in_New_York

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Marianne  just to let you know I read your comment, and the "Universal" slapstick...funny in any culture...and yes maybe you truly cannot go for a nationality...still however, the concept/possibility of a national sense of humour is intriguing!

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Yes, it is intriguing to look at a "national sense of humour" - lol.

But this sense of humour is rather a question of culture, i.e. "the importance of the intellectual production in this sector", involving literature, theatre, movies, music, cartoons, sketches, jokes, games, events and their their authors, artists and performers, producers, designers, writers, composers, etc., further their quality, popularity and their success (awards, scores, and/or commercial performances) on national and international levels which differs from one country to the other.

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Just to let you know I read your post, M...

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Thank you, Virginia.