I want to grow a giant bonsai...

Question

Would I need a cherry picker or would a ladder be good enough to get up into the branches? Could I prune it with a chain saw? What other tools would I need?

Answer 1

Just a good Katana sword ! Oopps, I thought you meant " Banzai " ! 

Comments

Don't think I'd like to be on the receiving end of a banzai charge, Rooster. I'm too stuffed to fight and too old to run.  

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Damn Pop !  You play too many of those damn games killing Nips ! Go back to that Asscrackistan 11 game you've been testing and battle the Taliban a while !

Answer 2

In Japanese, bon means tray and sai means plant, so you better get yourself a super duper big tray to grow it in.

Comments

Useful advice, Hippy. If the tray is big enough I could maybe try for the World Record. 

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Go for it Didge. When you're ready, I'll call Guinness.

Answer 3

About bonsai trees:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonsai (see instruments)

First of all, what species of tree would you pick for a giant bonsai and what size are you looking for?

Is the tree to be placed outdoors or indoors?

http://www.bonsaiempire.com/tree-species/juniper

https://www.evergreengardenworks.com/trunks.htm

http://www.bonsaitreegardener.net/types/redwood

Furthermore, for bigger trees, a guide for care and maintenance might be useful:

http://www.treeremoval.com/trimming-and-pruning/#.WFdBpVyNmM8

(but for bonsais, the roots should be "trimmed" too; they are in containers ...)

Comments

A California redwood, I think. And definitely outdoors.

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@Didge

In this case, you ought to take a look into information about the species:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sequoia_sempervirens

the basics of bonsai care

http://www.bonsaiempire.com/basics

http://www.bonsaiempire.com/tree-species/outdoor-bonsai

and then buy a good book.

About shapes:

http://www.bonsaiempire.com/tree-species/outdoor-bonsai

http://www.bonsaitreegardener.net/types/redwood

By the way, you have some interesting native tree species in your place.

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Sorry Marianne, it wasn't a serious question. You can't have a giant bonsai -- they're opposites.

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Lol - yes, of course. The chain saw, ladder, etc., or the katana "method" - well, Rooster and Ancient Hippy "stole the show" - lol.

But - oops - you fooled me with the remaining "giant" bonsai (on a tray, of course), as one can find some big, very expensive ones. I am wondering if the "quiz for seniors" inspired you ... And now that I think of it - was the idea of buying a site (blurtit) also a joke?

Big bonsai trees are, actually, far from the size of a Sequoiadendron giganteum, i.e. a giant sequoia or redwood, but still impressing and beautiful:

as much as you can find miniature bonsais:

And some curiosities:

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No, it wasn't a joke, but I didn't post that one. Rooster did. And, yes, he's negotiating for just that.

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Wow - I am amazed.