Well Sirfurryanimal, I am not sure this joke is 'fun,' but it is timely, going around the Internet now:
Q. If you have flu but can't get access to the test, then how do you find out if you have coronavirus?
A: Cough in a rich person's face and then wait for THEIR test results to come back.
It’s funny....
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? One snatches your watch. The other watches your snatch.
A young lad said, "Hell and damnation,
No cat houses FOR the duration.
But the girls are online,
And I'M on cloud nine,
Indulging in porn masturbation."
(As Sirfurryanimal said, 'keeping them coming.')
A young punk gets on the cross-town bus. He's got spiked, multi-colored hair that's green, purple, and orange. His clothes are a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he's wearing worn-out shoes. His entire face and body are riddled with pierced jewelry and his earrings are big, bright feathers. He sits down in the only vacant seat that's directly across from an old man who glares at him for the next ten miles. Finally, the punk gets self-conscious and barks at the old man, "What are you looking at you old fart... didn't you ever do anything wild when you were young?" Without missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah, back when I was young and in the Navy, I got really drunk one night in Singapore and screwed a parrot.... I thought maybe you were my son.''
I'll tell you a coronavirus joke, but you’ll have to wait two weeks to see if you got it.
Nail salons, hair salons, waxing centers and tanning parlors are closed. It’s going to get ugly out there.
Finland just closed its borders. You know what that means. No one will be crossing the finish line.
After numerous rounds of, "We don't know if Osama is still alive," Osama himself decided to send Obama a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Obama opened the letter which appeared to contain a single line of the coded message, 370HSSV-0773H. Obama was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry. Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. No one could solve it at the FBI, so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help. Within a few seconds, the Marine Corps cabled back with this reply, "Tell the President he's holding the message upside down."
Very good
It is very funny.
.........
How could you tell the coroner was a Buddhist? He always marked the cause of death as “birth.”
........
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